More, God! More!
The Cry Of the Dissatisfied Heart
At some point in my Christian life I began wondering if there was more.
I saw others who seemed to have deeper connections with God. They heard His voice. They had dreams and visions. They saw angels. They received blessings.
These people seemed to have some special X factor that I was missing. They just had something more.
I began to be discipled by seemingly older and wiser Christians as I pondered what I was missing. I studied under the ministry of super-Christians who had television programs and wrote bestselling books. These religious leaders encouraged me to embrace my dissatisfaction.
I learned about holy dissatisfaction — The idea behind always asking God for more. If you stay dissatisfied with your current condition, then God will respond to your hunger by moving you into new realms of His blessing.
I cultivated a personal faith life that consisted of praising God for His salvation and also begging God for something more.
I had been taught to believe that embracing holy dissatisfaction meant I could go beyond the basic, vanilla, status quo version of Christianity.
God’s forgiveness, brotherly love, and Christian service were a nice starting place, but there was more for those who were willing to seek more.
But you had to count the cost. You had to dig deep. You had to truly be hungry for more. (Insert your own cliché here.)
“More, God!” became the cry of my dissatisfied heart.
I found myself in churches where “More!” was declared as a prayer and a blessing over those gathered during altar calls and worship times.
Supernatural power, divine purpose, and personal intimacy with God were on the top of my More List. I was also taught to expect the blessings of financial prosperity, God-ordained relationships, and a general feeling that I was among God’s favorites.
All of this was part of “normal Christianity”, I was told. It was the process of moving from glory to glory.
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.”
2 Corinthians 3:17–18, ESV
2 Corinthians 3:17–18 was proclaimed a lot as we all cried for more. The verses were twisted to be about working harder to earn the next level of glory.
Prayer, positive confession, declaration, worship, deliverance, honor for leaders, forgiveness of enemies, spiritual warfare, and the exercise of spiritual gifts were all emphasized as the pathways to reach higher heights in God.
If you look at the passage in its context, however, there is clearly a different idea being presented. In the third chapter of 2 Corinthians we find a rich teaching about the New Covenant and how the Holy Spirit is changing the believer in ways that were not possible under the Old Covenant. It is the work of the Spirit, not the work of the believer, that is being described.
For roughly fifteen years I chased the more and found myself always weary of the work required.
I would experience highs where I felt super-spiritual and then I would have lows where I felt like I was not doing enough. One day I would be hearing God’s voice & experiencing clarity about my purpose on the earth, and the next, I would be feeling totally empty and far from God.
Living a life of holy dissatisfaction is an endless emotional roller coaster.
A phrase from Scripture is coming to mind as I consider these things. Something that I wish I would have recognized and embraced sooner. Simplicity of heart.
The New King James Version (which was my preferred translation as a young believer) uses this phrase when describing the disposition of the early Christians.
“So continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they ate their food with gladness and simplicity of heart, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily those who were being saved.”
Acts 2:46–47, NKJV
In its larger context, this passage describes what the early church looked like.
The Apostles were preaching the gospel and God was performing great signs through them to confirm their words. The reverential fear of the Lord was falling on many. People were being brought into the church daily. Christians were sharing their resources and gathering in fellowship, with gladness and simplicity of heart.
I think it’s remarkable to see that even in the midst of the Apostolic ministry of preaching accompanied by signs and wonders, the Christians were not clamoring to have the Apostolic gifts.
You will be hard pressed to find the Apostles teaching anyone how to perform signs and wonders, manifest blessings, or live dissatisfied in order to gain more from God. (Though I do recall a man by the name of Simon who asked for their gifts and he was sharply rebuked. See Acts 8.)
Instead of giving instructions in miracles, signs, wonders, and supernatural power and calling it “normal Christianity”, the Apostles instructed Christians to live quiet, peaceful lives characterized by brotherly love and devotion to Christ.
I used to want to have more. Nowadays, I find myself wanting gladness and simplicity of heart. I am pursuing fidelity to the Apostles’ teaching (Scripture) and contentment in my Christian faith.
I realize now that the lifestyle of dissatisfaction is not holy. It is selfish. Dissatisfaction toward a God who shed His very blood for our salvation is the quintessential disposition of a wicked heart.
In a culture of materialism, mysticism, and purpose-driven drivel, It’s not always easy to be content in simplicity.
But godliness with contentment is great gain.
